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ADDICTION

Addiction - What does it mean?

Are you worried that there is any aspect of your behaviour for which you feel you are loosing control, that maybe you find it difficult to function without indulging in, or at the very least you are spending a lot of your time thinking about it or perhaps it is costing you financially, affecting your health or destroying your close relationships.  You may not even consider that you have an addiction, perhaps you see it as a compulsion, a craving or simply an act of pleasure.  The fact that you are reading this probably means that something you (or someone you care about) are engaging in, is causing you concern.  Remember, you will not be alone with this - many people are caught up in self-destructive behaviours.  Addiction can be in the form of just about anything: drugs, smoking, alcohol, caffeine, working compulsively, shopping, gambling, eating, exercising and so on, note this includes so called socially acceptable and pleasurable activities too!

So why do we pursue activities/ behaviours compulsively, knowing that they are detrimental to our wellbeing?  It has been shown through research that these behaviours follow a common pathway in the brain - the 'expectation pathway' (dopamine enriched transmissions).  This allows for emotions to surface even at the anticipation of the addictive behaviour and the brain searches for all the pleasurable matching memories for this behaviour when it is indulged in.  Unfortunately rarely, if ever, are the negative associations re-called, until after the event.  It is the anticipation along with the withdrawal symptoms, which keep us going back for more, time on time.  Therefore, it would make sense that if we consciously challenge the positive expectations with the reality of the actual consequences it would help break down the addiction.  To complement this efforts must be made to understand and satisfy the unmet emotional needs that originally led the person into the addictive tendencies.


A few common lies that addiction tells us:

  • It makes me feel better/ life seems good! - Ask yourself for how long? Until the guilt, feeling ill, health damage, relationship loss etc. kicks in.
  • It helps me relax/ deal with stress! - Actually it causes stress, it's a way of putting off dealing with something, that is still there afterwards.  The result is unmet needs and an addiction.
  • It helps me to enjoy social events - Do you really believe this, think back, has this always been the case?  Also think about all the embarrassing times!
  • It makes me feel in control! - It is actually controlling you, else you would be able to say 'no', think about how free your life would be without all the negative associations.
  • It doesn't matter if my health is affected, at least I enjoy my life! - Stand back and think about that, you are probably on a fast track to a very poor quality of life, if the addiction continues.
  • I will give it up next week - This is how addiction keeps you.  Making plans in advance to stop, usually means that you will 'up' your behaviour - to make the most before quitting and then fail to quit anyway.  The problem only worsens.

Ask yourself these questions

  1. What does addiction mean to you - When did it all start?  What did you enjoy about it?  How has this addiction/ behaviour developed over time (has it increased in order to achieve the same effect?) Does it still mean the same to you?  What experiences can you still relate to it?  Is it still as fulfilling?  Are there certain occasions/ instances that make you want to do it?  During, before and after, what thoughts/ expectations do you have or perceive to have?
  2. What are your concerns about the addiction? - do you worry about it's effects on your physical or emotional health/ relationships/ work life/ social life/ finances or that it encourages you to perform illegal acts?
  3. What is the impact on those that are close to you, do they have any concerns about you? (considering these questions)
  4. What aspirations do you have for your future? - consider careers, relationships, home, children, traveling and so on.
  5. How does your addictive behaviour interfere with these hopes? - think, past, present and future.
  6. How would you like to change? How would like things to be different? How would you feel about yourself if you stopped? How much would your life change for the better?

Addictive behaviours have been described briefly above, if you would like more information or would like to know how we can help you, please contact us.

The Emotional Needs Audit  - follow this link to assess how well your emotional needs are being met in your life, now.


For Counselling face to face - private clinic, please follow this link.




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